new corperate slogans

What technology are you addicted to? And really what do you us it for??? Think about it and consider this:

I can think of a few more. Facebook: "We've got you, and we are never going to let you go." Netflix: "What do you mean you don't want to watch Code Mission? It's a straight-to-video release that's just like The Matrix!" 

a new way to charge your i-products

I found a better way for you to charge your iPod or iPhone. Now you don't have to worry about leaving your charger at home or not having enough battery for your favorite tunes when on a long flight. Instead you can just whip out this mask:



Now don't be frightened. We haven't returned to a time of air strikes or gasing, but instead invented some really pretty technology for your Apple devices.

This mayyyyy be the first strike in the machines' eventual overthrow of the human race. I always assumed our gadgets would turn against us in a full scale military assault, but it turns out the revolt will happen quietly, by tricking us into voluntary enslavement. We're already using our own breath, the very thing that keeps us alive, to give them power. What else will they demand of us?

Luckily the safest place to be is America, where the obesity epidemic has put so many of us on respirators that we simply have no oxygen to spare. I may have some after attempting to climb a flight of stairs though. OR this is much more likely:

make your own tweets

I found another new website, but this one allows you to make your own celebrity tweets that you always wanted to see. Have you been begging for a Twitter shout-out from your favorite famous person, but they're too busy making terrible music, movies, or television to heed your pathetic cries for attention? Well now you can! Make fake (but dangerously convincing) tweet from LET ME TWEET THAT FOR YOU, a tweet template and bad-idea-waiting-to-happen that puts every celebrity Twitter account at your michievous fingertips. Here are some of my favorites:

This is bringing me back to PPTK at Christmas....oh D!

See Rush just needs a HUG :)

thinking about social media

My friend T told me recently that she feels like she is falling behind in the social media movement. I asked how she knew and she said when she reads website there are about 25 new icons at the bottom of posts or entries where you can do something with it. Yeah I guess that is true, but I never thought about it that way.

So maybe we need some education on what is what and what they do. Perhaps a metaphor would work best so that it is in layman terms. Enter the donut example, because you doesn't want a donut right now:

LLSpot, donuts look like ....

I vote for ariel

People have some pretty strong opinions and emotions about font choice. I've had two people in the last month comment on my email font choice and size...as if I care what they think. I am an ariel fan through and through and throw. You know, ariel or it is arial? OK well whichever one isn't the mermaid who could sing.

One of my tech friends mentioned to me years ago that there was a documentary movie about the font Helvetica. Apparently this movie examines "how font affects our lives" and especially the bastard son Helvetica. I can undoubtedly say that it really don't effect my, at least not in any meaningful way.

Now I hear about the new Comic Sans Project sweeping the interwebs. As their tagline states, "Helvetica is soooo 2011" and since we are two days away from 2012, I'm on board. These graphic designers are changing all your favorite telemarkerting logos and font type into the teacher-friendly comic sans. It is just so friendly and bubbly and soft....just makes me all warm and fuzzy inside.

On a parting note, it is worth me mentioned I'm considering switching my email font to Chiller. It would be like Halloween or Twilight all year long. Sounds like a plan.

the best viral videos of 2011

Here are the best viral videos of 2011, check out to see how many of them you have seen (if not too many, congrats on having a life outside of your computer):



Each one of these videos had over 1 million views on youtube. That is is absolutely nuts. No wonder the economy is in the shitter. The more jobs are flowing through computers, the more we are multitasking to watch cats, and babies online. The world mayyy be coming to an end.

I want to live in effin

I used to live near a town called Leslie, which would have been cool is I lived on a similar named street within the town. LL, on LL St, in LL-ville. Same thing happened with my cousin in the Seattle area. It could totally happen...

Speaking on towns I'd like to live in, I recently read about a town called "Effin". Where is this you ask??? Why of course it is in Ireland, land of one of my favorite word "FECK" and 200,000 shades of green. This country town has a whopping 1000 people but has become an international sensation once Facebook (in all it's infinite wisdom) decided not to recognize it as a true city.

Facebook, what an j-hole. I knew that rich ginger Zuckerman/burg wears an asshat. Many previous citizens from the great city of EFFIN have started facebook campaigns and appealed to the FB gods. However, these efforts have fallen short as the town is still not recognized as a legit locality. Some irate FBers have stated "I'm a proud Effin woman" and that just made me giggle.

This sounds like a mathematical problem, or FB is really bad at geography. We need to get Sheldon on this business. I bet it is all about the html code and algorithms. See EFFIN is just too close to many swear words and FB is gonna cockblock the shit out of you until you move into a more normally coined town.

And thus another solid reason to hate on facebook and that famous backstabbing ginger.

where does my laptop go?

Let's play a game.

Guess where LL brings her laptop constantly:

• The toilet
• The bathtub
• My bed
• The coffee shop
• The plastic pinto

Here are some case and point examples for you....

I really don't see a problem with this. Sure sure I could die due to the combination of water and electricity, but what is life without a little risk. I'm more worried when its extreme hot water and the mirror is dripping in condensation. Think about what that is doing to my motherboard.

And sadly this case and point is also my life:

It may seem incredibly depressing to think that the only thing warming my bed during these cold winter months is the laptop I snuggle up beside, but that's an antiquated thought process. This is the future. You're not alone if you have a trusted computer that intimately knows your tastes in music, sitcoms, and pornography. I say let the machines repay us for building them by providing the occasional adrenaline and dopamine needed to simulate an emotional connection with another living being.

webcam 101

Old people are so funny. I have noticed momma and poppa B in particular are much more carefree in their retirement. They laugh alot more and are generally more tolerable.

But technology can be real confusing for old people. I mean there are so many buttons and warning and business happening. I swear. Case and point, take this old couple who's working on their computer, trying to get their damn webcam to work right....there also is a request to show your boobs, making me wonder if old people porn is on the rise:



That grandma is going to town on some cough drop! Or she is rolling her fake teeth around in her mouth. Man that grandpa is a check too...burping and singing and requesting flashing.

I don't need no stinkin iPod

This may or may not be my live-in loverpant, N:



I know, I know, soooo ghetto yet inventive, right?

But let me ask you this: Does your mp3 player provide you with lumbar support??? It's hard to get down to Lady Gaga with lower back pain.

Someone please enter this man into a contest to win an iPod touch. On second thought, I would gladly give up my iPod shuffle for that pan full of bacon.

a conversation I would have

Hahahaha:

OK now here we GO again

Well they have done it again. I swear, the band OK GO is truly amazing videographers, not to mention artists. They did the trendmills, then the mouse trap, then the genius dogs, and NOW we get this:



Whether or not you like the song, you’ll get lost in the four-person human kaleidoscope that you can manipulate on your own (#SYNERGY). Look at all the words, the feet, the colors! 2011, this is what your music looks like now. Check out the video dance messenger and make your own!

Creative geniuses. I (secretly) hate you.

the math of music

Perhaps I've been watching too much Num8ers lately, but I am seeing everything with a math-vision. I ran across this video of a guy filming his guitar from the inside. Remember wave frequencies? Remember learning about vibrations? This is pretty awesome:

a cute love story

Splitscreen: A Love Story from JW Griffiths on Vimeo.

social media is the future

Liking this video:

some people just don't get slang

This is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen.

Word.

Stupidity.

photo feeds

I've become a fan of these odd Tumbr photo feeds. I have run across a couple of these feeds, for example jumping twi-hotttties added all kinds of other photos. Recently, there has been one with Tom Hanks as animals (well duh because "he is the greatest actor ever") and he tweeted how honored he was. I guess I particularly enjoy when the subject's of photo feeds find them, and make comments. People actually do spend their time with editing photos??? Totally funny. Makes me giggle. There are always some good ones.

I need connections to more feeds, where from my understanding anyone can post a picture and if tagged properly will also appear on the site feed. Loves it. Suggestions?

multi-tasking on the toilet

You know, I'm one of the ultimate multi-taskers. Well how the hell do you think I get so much done? I can organize and multi-task the shit out of you. Due to this fact, a recent study was not surprising to me, or maybe even too low.

I just read about a study finding suggesting that 27% of American use their mobile device to check facebook when on the toilet. Only 27%??? I probably spend over 50% of my toilet time multi-tasking. I talk on the phone and flush with my foot to avoid good cell reception. I frequently bring my entire laptop with me while watching a movie. I also talk on the phone when in airport bathrooms. I guarantee if you are reading this, I've been working on a good number two whilst talking to you on the phone.

I can even tell when other's are in the bathroom and attempting to multi-task (and consequently not doing it as good as me). Case and point, I talked to a friend the other day and I asked what she was doing (a normal LL first question to establish the situation). I said "well it sounds like you're in the bathroom" and she replied no way, but I insisted that is was OK if she was. Turn out, sure enough I got her to crack and admit it to me right there. It was great.

Now I'm not a fan of facebook but I have tweeted from the can. With this new phone, I can be an even better multi-tasker. Here's hoping in the next year I'm up to 75% of phone usage on the toilet. I can do it.

can you hear me now?

Well last weekend I took a preventive step, before the damm thing died, and invested a new cell phone. I've had the same piece of shit one for over 3 years and in the world of cell phones that is just a-mazing. I have been anticipating the release of the iPhone to other carriers besides those AT&T asshats, but when I heard it was only Verizon, I ended the strike. I bought a stupid Android and then bitched about it for 2 days. I'm not changing phone companies and therefore I'll still travel with my iTouch, my iPod and now my Android. Shoot me in my head.

So everyone is sooo excited. That sound you hear??? Millions of AT&T users switching to an equally crappy service, and then everyone yelling into their new iPhone, "CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?" (or if you were LL, you'd say it in German). OK OK we get it Verizon, you have a catchy telemarketing brand.....you can walk in circles asking repetitive questions with your phone and everyone still gets the message. Yessss for christsake we can hear you, you're getting an iPhone, now stop bragging about it.

My purse is heavy from the 70 pound of electronics I carry. I hate you.

technology has made it to the masses

Well it's official....some advanced technology have made it to the masses. Case and point, a majority of the Christmas cards I received this year were just those picture post cards. The friends and family that would normally send a card or at least a letter update, only send one picture postcard with basic holiday salutations. No stories, no updates, just a picture.

You know what this means, right? It means that technology has officially made it to the masses, where older generations now know how to upload pictures to the internets and order holiday products. I mean these are people who couldn't turn on a computer 5 years ago, but now are making creative Christmas greetings. I just can't believe it, changes are happening. Maybe Momma B will be able to proactively do this next year???

Just an observation for ya'll.