still on vacation

So my body is back in VA but my brain is still on vacation. The neurons aren't firing right yet. Case and points:

1. I attempted to brew coffee in my press this morning with ice cold water. Then I tried to microwave it to get it warm, but remember it had metal in it and that I shouldn't light Betty's microwave on fire. Idiot.
   
2. At lunch I was heating a can of Spaghetti O's which I knocked over onto my kitchen floor and rug. There was tomato sauce and O's all over the kitchen. Sucks.
   
3. In the afternoon I rubbed my nose with my hand and ripped my nostril. I forgot about the new ring on my index finger. Ouch.
4. While getting ready for yoga tonight, I grabbed a bottle of water out of the refrig and throw it on the couch while I was putting on my coat. When I grabbed the bottle again it was empty, I looked and it had emptied into my couch because that bottle had no lid. Brilliant.

In summary, on my first day back I have a wet couch, a ripped nose, and a stained kitchen rug. But on a positive note I still have a microwave without burnt wholes.