Tuesday, December 7, 2010

run, my friends, run!!

Well I'm overdue with chronicling my vacation about a month ago. It all started with a marathon race on Halloween in DC. As in the District of Columbia, you ask?? Why yes, the entire town shuts down, 21000 people run, and thousands come to watch the craziness. I mentioned previously that my friends are the best, and they had decided to run their balls off in order to raise money for the Lupus Foundation of America. They ran 26 miles and raised over $2000. AMAZING!!! (PS, you can still donate).

There were lots of stories that started around 7 AM, but let's skip ahead to 3ish when we all reunited:



We got TWO FINISHERS!!! Woot, woot. JB and B got metals whilst Helga and I were still in our last minute Halloween costumes. Typical, I'm the tall devil with horns! While Helga gets to be a little pussy :)

At this point of the marathon-day-of-fun, we were just so happy to find JB. We saw them both at mile 1, JB at 10, and both at 16 where we were a little worried. JB finished like a trouper (despite the bum knee), then collapsed in the arms of a hot marine who was "concerned about the slurring of words"--yep I saw the medical report word for word!!! If Brian or I were there we would have thrown her over our shoulder and said "she's fine, don't worry about"--the line we've been saying for 10 years whenever she looks drunk in a bar! They med-tented her up and then sent her through the crowd of 20,000 people. When we finally found her, we embraced, we cried, we gave her more oranges to smear across her face and the first words she says "THAT WAS TOO LONG!!!" We slowly carried her back to the plastic pinto (hoping she didn't crap her shorts due to excess laughter), but half way across the bridge we heard the finish line music and.....



....Cripple dance party!!! 1 Luppie and an injured runner. There was lots of pelvic thrusting and air humping right there in the middle of DC. We were bumping to the song that eventually became the jam of the week. And speaking of pelvic thrusts, we all had a good time stretching it out with the Big B whilst waiting for JB:



Betty's favorite photo was Helga and I thrusting each other while Brian did a squat. Two thrusts and a squat....can't complain! Sooo here are some of the highlights for you all:
  • During mile 1, some dude ran by and yelled "here cat girl" and through a Marine OooRah flag at Helga. From here on out I carried that flag yelling "WHO-HA" instead of Oorah, until I was afraid that someone might shoot me for basically yelling "VAGINA" as part of my enthusiasm.
  • I balanced my f/phat ass on a cement barrier holding up a "Run, Brian, Run! You can do it!" sign for over an hour, and neither Brian nor JB saw me. They both ran by seeing the people on the damn ground!
  • At some point I was commenting about how my arms had been in the air for at least 45 minutes holding up signs.....Betty turns and is like "really, really? you are complaining that are arms hurt while your friends run 26 miles???" Well in the words of Crazy Grandma, gravity is a bitch!
  • Sign of the day "My wife beats me (at running)"
  • Due to the random shootings in DC that week, there was some major security and firepower at the race. Helga and I saw a SWAT guy with 3 guns strapped to his legs and a 4 foot sniper riffle guarding a port-a-potty. Also, there were low flying helicopters with men hanging out of them with guns. Scary!
  • That carb goo helps with energy during the race, but it makes you dangerously gassy! Light a match, seriously fierce.
  • Lasagna and ice baths make for good pre- and post-race activities even if profanities are involved.
  • If you are ever going to run a marathon (btw, you're crazy) the place to do it in this race....there are soooo many people, monuments, bands, and excitement throughout the course that you are never bored as a runner (until you make the bridge your bitch).
THANK YOU so much for visiting, for running, for raising money for Lupus, and for everyone who supported their efforts. It was a beautiful, fun and amazingly inspiring day!!! Thank you for being a part of it! xoxoxo

PS, and one last photo to make your day....this person was dressed in a sumo blow up suit and had no idea I was being all sneaky behind her:

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