Showing posts with label bridawg. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bridawg. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

pictorial evidence of alaska

Alright folks, here are the AK/AL money shots. Although I hear people do appreciate my running commentary and the colorful LLish anecdotes, I know you all are waiting with baited breath for the pictorial evidence of my Alaskan adventure. If you are interested in a crazy girl's ramblings, check out this update 1, 2, 3, and the final. If you want more details you'll have to buy me some steamed mussels and a fruity martini....

Well let's start with my favorite picture of the trip which has already been posted on my desktop. We took this when walking on the ice glacier, and it includes the snowy mountains, the green/cooper mountains, the glacier, the dirty rocks which apparently come with all glaciers, a not-as-cloudy sky, and some beautiful wild flowers. All Alaskan goodness wrapped up in one photo:



And of course, the big ball of death in the sky was out this say so I was full clothed and trying to remain pale :) But whilst hiking on the big block of ice, I let my uni-bomber hood down long enough to soak up a little vitamin D. Dirty blue ice is soooo hot, I'd do push ups and cut up my hands/knees all day to drink that glacier water filtered in dirty rocks:



We also had an opportunity to ride a sky tram into the Alaskan sky. It was a ride about 2000 feet (or something "God-like" coming from the person who has no sense of measurement) into the heavens to overlook more of the frozen tundra. I like this picture because it looks like I can literally reach out into the clouds and you can see all the brilliant shades of snow-topped green (reminding me of Ireland, and that Irish song of 120 colors of green....Momma B knows it):



On one of our day trips we went to Wittitttittter which populates about 120 people. I loved it. I ate Reindeer and pooped in a hole. This city is right on the ocean so I could get my toeys wet. I spend some high quality time on one of their rocky beaches while waiting for a train to become unstuck from the 2 1/2 mile one-lane tunnel of death. Anyways, Bridawg, Coopster and I did a little posing in the beautiful wilderness:



I also really like this picture because it is cloudy, it has some of those "Charlie Brown-like Christmas trees," glaciers, snowy mountains, and that picturesque crystal blue ocean water:



I also became an adapted Aunt as Cooper (my pooper) bonded for a good 5 days. In this pictorial evidence of our budding relationship, I have his cameo 1-year old self on my 6 foot tall shoulders. We had many a dance parties with me singing, and both of us shaking our booties while flaring our limbs about as if independent of our bodies. In this picture we are entertaining all the other cars waiting to get through the tunnel of death (and he may have been drooling on my head):



As I mentioned before, I was planning on shooting a moose, or Sarah Palin, or a moose/palin from an airplane whilst in Alaska (or drinking some smoked salmon vodka, which we didn't find...damnit). Unfortunately, Ryan wouldn't let me touch his guns (teheheh) but I did get a little wild moose visual hunting in. This is the money shot of the male bull moose we saw which I termed "Bullwinkle" (original, I know). He was just going about his business, eating grass, and not trying to mount/hump me! So I got these amazing pictures of him in his natural green environment:



Also as a final Alaskan observation, I think those Alaskan navies have dog ears. Either Bridawg, Rhino or I would be whispering to each other about something and some Alaskan would hear us. It literally happened everyday no matter where we were. I couldn't believe the sensitive hearing those Alaskans have, even when I'm making rude observations....

Want more pictures? Email me bitches!

final alaskan update

Well I made back to the big VA this afternoon! I had to run my ass through the Houston airport at like 6 AM to make my connection, whilst thinking "god damnit I'm a Lupie and can't take this shit, I need some fruit and a bloody mary." Then I taxied it throughout DC and drove the plastic pinto back to Cville. Overall, the way home seemed much easier than the way there. I just think I do better going west to east. Left to right. Wrong to right. Time zones screw me every which way no matter where I'm at in the world. Never fails.

But I digress, let's work backwards to my last couple days in the great northern region of the United States. On Monday, we loaded up the truck to go visit a real Glacier. I've seen glaciers in Montana but they pale in comparison to those in the frozen tundra. We saw some on our drive the previous day, but this time we were going to a "private" one where once you sign your life away (and unborn children) you can walk onto the big chuck of icy death. This rocked my socks off. The best part was when I was convinced to drink running and bubbling glacier water on my hands and knees, despite my previous reservations about moose poop and dirt filters. I'll admit, it was pretty delicious and refreshing especially when it came back up through my nose whilst laughing when Rhino started dry humping me from behind....LOOK OUT FOR STINK HOLES!!! People have died in this icy stank holes, apparently.

Throughout this vacay it felt like home: MN men were driving me around in big trucks (cough cough Brian), whilst playing country music, and with my feet sometimes hanging out the window. There was lots of swearing which included ending every statement with "bitches" or "cheese dick" or finding the word "asshole" somewhere in every conversation. There were many times where I laughed till I may have wet myself a little, and in my thick book that is a good sign of an amazing vacation. I came home with a suitcase of clean clothes, and a backpack of seasoning and hops which I swear probably look like pot and drugs in the TSA x-rays.

Thanks Bridawg, Rhino and Coopster my little poopster for an amazing vacay!!! Love you all very much. Now move your sexy bitch asses back to MN so I visit you there more often.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

an alaskan update part 2

**No pictures until I get back to the lower 48s because I decided not to bring my laptop last minute, but I'm still getting some good pics**

Well it is official. I saw a moose or two yesterday. And apparently I saw a male bull moose because it had horns/antlers that were big and fuzzy. I called him bullwinkle. Brian texted me wanting to know if I petted it and I replied, I didn't want to get that close because I was afraid it would mount me!!! Bridawg has had moose chase after her. Ryan called me a moose papazzi because I was taking pictures like no one's business, and jumping out of the car, and runnin across the road....

Next I need to find Levi....I heard he has a place in Anchorage now....

The little pooper had a great birthday party yesterday. There was this other little child that I was secretly inCLASS coding through the afternoon, and after everyone left I exclaimed "that kid was a little shit." Seriously low on Peer Sociability, no Peer Assertiveness, and my little Cooper had great Behavior Control when that shit kept hitting him over his Buzzlight toy. The best birthday gift was from this guy who brought a big box, which was painted with bingo dobers and filled with old tubberware. It was a hit when all the kids started stacking them and planning with them. Best gift ever. Boxes and used tupperware. The kid is only 1 and doesn' t know what is going on anyways...

Yesterday we also went to an Alaskan farmers/juke market downtown where I buy all kind of local business. I got gifts and stufff for me and made friends with some Alaskans granola eating naives. We went looking for salmon at some low tide place but ended up just having a dance party with Cooper my little pooper. He is a really good dancer and loves it when I sing to him in public! We also randomally pulled over at some lake and did a little impromptu swimming. Ryan and I convinced Bri to let Cooper go in the water fully clothed and diapered. It was the best birthday after as he played in the water and sand with me!

More observations from Alaska:
  • All the Alaskan neighborhoods have houses that are a three way cross between MN northern cabins, FL beach cottages, and army housing. They are typically longer, 2-story split level, with the garage in front, and odd placed decks and windows. I like them but I can't put my finger on if they are preparing for a flood or for lots of snow, or both!
  • The pine trees here are like Charile Brown christmas trees alittle. They are tall, skinny, and don't always have alot of needles on them. This is stark contrast to the Pacific NW trees I'm used to...
  • I parked in the Anchorage Mayors spot last night. Still hoping to get arrested before I leave this great state....
  • They call public buses "people movers" here....yep it is painted right on the side of the big b-u-s. I guess that too is an accurate name. People mover. Hmmmm.
  • Speaking of odd names, they also call snowmobiles, snow-machines. The trail signs says "no snow-machining"
  • Apparently I'm turning into my Grandpa S. (nice tits) and momma B, because Ryan called me a human GPS yesterday. I didn't realize that I was naming off everything we were driving by. I guess I was giving a running commentary of what was going through my head, and it was cracking everyone up. I almost wet my pants laughing when I realized this.
  • I was reading off the trail signs the other day when we were hiking and it said "no humping" and I shouted "WHAT, I can't hump when in the woods!!!" Ohhh, Ok I bet that just said no dumping. My bad, I don't have my glasses on. My mistake :) Happens to me all the time, as my mind is more dirrty than the averager persons!
  • In a previous life I may have been one of those weight guessing carnies at a county fair because yesterday Ryan bet me I couldn't get with $5 of our bill of beer and food at a restaurant, and I got within $0.89!!! Take that bitches!

Saturday, July 3, 2010

an alaskan update part 1

Well I safely made it to Anchorage on Thursday afternoon/evening after a grueling 13 hours plane ride. Yep I was literally on airplanes, and not necassarily on layovers in airports, for what seemed like ever. I almost took a bump which would have caused me to get into AL like 8 hours later, and that might have pushed me over the edge. I am not made (all 6 plus feet of me) to sit in tiny airplane seats for that long of a time.

I made it safely and got to start hanging out with my little cooper, the pooper, Bri and Ryan's one year old son. He is super cute and amazing calm, patience, and fun for a 1 year old. Today is his 1 year old birthday party and they are throwing a big BBQ. The only job I got was to cut up the strawberries but I did buy him a really too big t-shirt that says "someone loves you in Cville". I'm amazing, I know.

Well here are some of my beginning observations of Alaska:
  • Yeah well they ain't kidding about that "it's light out for 21 hours a day" thing. That is for real. It might not be sunny out, been mostly cloudy, but is it light enough to read outside until 2 AM in the morning. Crazy business.
  • Bri says Ambien is the most filled prescription during the summer, yeah I bet.
  • I saw my first moose yesterday and by the time Ryan quick flipped a bitch in the road to go back to see it more up close, it was gone. So it may have been possible that I saw a moose mirage, but I'm sticking with my story.
  • We went to a home brew store yesterday and to a brewery. I loved it and got some gifts. Surprisingly there are alot of breweries up here, drinking is in style.
  • People refer to me from "the lower 48." Yep, this is an attitude sort of like I have for the Carolinas or the Dakotas, where I tend to lump states together, well up here they lump all 48 of us together!
  • I went for my first hike yesterday and apparently most people hike with guns here because of the bears and some rabit mooseseses. I just brought my captain and tennile, but Ryan had holster a gun whilst Bri holster Cooper whilst I took pictures of the landscape. I was really pulling my weight.
  • Bri and Ryan are doing well and are happy and amazing and still loads of fun.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

a twi-update

Well we are now less than 7 days away from the official premiere of the 3rd installment of the twilight movie franchise (PS, 4th book will now officially be 2 movies just so we can drag this shit out for years and years to come). And the madness has officially begun with people taking days and days off of work in order to camp out for tickets. We are entered the world-craziness-status that HP has. People in LA have been camping out for the premiere for days now and have officially coined the name, Eclipse Tent City:


Can we just take a moment to put this all in perspective??? Really, using your sick days to urban camp for weeks on end?? I mean I know you brought your life size Edward cardboard cutouts, and your Jacob stuffed pillows to comfort you, but still. I won't be happy if this twi-craziness makes our economy go down the toilet. I know your buying movie tickets, but you crazy ladies still have to work your jobs too.

I spoke with my Bridawg today and officially served warning that we may have to see this movie over Memorial day weekend whilst I'm shooting a moose in Alaska. She was down and will buy us some vodka as well. That 'a girl, now we're talking!

And for those asking which team I'm on....I'm "whatever team I can get"....I don't like to limit myself!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

t minus 2 wk for mooses

Soooo we are within 2 weeks of my epic trip to the BIG state of Alaska so that I can shoot a moose. My big summer vacay will be occurring as I make the trek up to a state where I can see Russia from my friend's patio, and check to see if Palin really had a boob job.

I've mentioned previously that I have a long list of things I want to do while in the northern most state of America, including shooting a moose or getting knocked up by Levi. I may have to settle with just some Miller Light and "Coooooper my little Pooper" bonding time. I'm sure there will be much laughter and hopefully some good fireworks too. BUT I need to extend my list of vacay must do's, so think about it, and come back with something fun.

For example, is there such a thing of an Alaskan accent? and can I learn it???