laziness around the holidays

Well it's officially December which means I can start talking about the holidays without fear of being scorned or have rocks thrown at me. I've been warming up for the holidays with thoughts of gifts in a box as well as some good holiday-themed music. Tis the season and remember the reason, you crazy bitch.

Not everyone is as cheerful or organized as the big LL. Let's examine a couple examples of laziness during the season exemplified.

Case and point #1:

Wow, you are super lazy. L-a-z-y. For reals. I mean at least get a fake tree like Nik made me do (then just keep stating "recycle, reuse, refresh"). Nope this dude stopped by the gas station on the way home, while picking up a 40 oz. and chewing tobacco, and got a wintergreen scented air freshener. Then he sat at home thinking about a good way to display it...that was until he got an inch on his back and discovered his trusty back scratcher. At least it is smells like a Christmas tree and you don't have to worry about all the presents fitting under it!

Case and point #2:



Yeah you suck too. Lazy mother fers. And PS your arrow point left is burnt out so you suck more.

Sometimes extreme apathy can lead to extreme ingenuity. With one simple word and a minuscule fraction of the effort, the guy on the right is expressing the exact same level of Christmas spirit as his show-offy, bigger-budgeted neighbor. Plus that guy borrowed a rake from him like three years ago, so it all evens out.

Case and point #3:

Jesus didn't even have electricity....what does he care!?!?

This is totally the lupus way of approaching the holidays. Good intentions immediately shot to shit with a little bit of pirate-like swearing thrown in there. Sounds about right.

Well tis the season everyone!

I need a homeboy

I'm not sure our lord and savior would appreciate all the ways in which we have made him a little mcghetto. I mean, I'm generally on board with the "Jesus is my homeboy" t-shirts, especially when he is carrying an 80s beatbox. But it might be taking this hip-ty hop-ty business a little too far when churches put this on their signs:

This of course is in reference to driving with drugs, guns or other such illegal stuff in your plastic pinto equalivalent. But I do believe this pastor needs a little education because it isn't "riding dirty", instead it should be "ridin dirtty." If you are going to rip off Chamillionaire at least get it right. Seriously. Plus I hope this church is in Duluth or Fargo, because if it is anywhere in the South that is even more unacceptable.

I need a homeboy that will ride dirtty with me...jesus?